Month Eleven : Wedding Day
The secret to planning a good wedding is to understand that the day itself
will mostly be remembered for all the spontaneous, unplanned for moments:
fabulous food and flowers and a great band or DJ will not go unnoticed, but
the atmosphere and how inclusive your wedding is will be what determines
whether it is a good or a great day. All you are doing in the months
leading up to the celebration is attempting to create as good a backdrop as
you can to help create and promote that atmosphere. If you have done your
job well, come the wedding day you will be able to allow yourself to really
enjoy the day and encourage others to do so. But there are a few hints and
tips we'd like to offer you now to really add the polish to your occasion
and a touch of Scottish tradition.
By now we're assuming you've booked your wedding in Scotland. In addition to incorporating some Highland Dress within the wedding party (see 'Bridalwear' and 'Groomswear'), there are a few Scottish traditions you can embrace that will be both appropriate and inclusive. Arguably, nothing says 'Scotland' better than the site and sound of a piper in full Highland Dress. So once you have secured the services of one (see 'Music & Entertainment' in our Wedding Suppliers search to find individuals and agencies who can assist) you can use and abuse him to perform all manner of rituals come the day! You can be piped both in and out of the ceremony and to lead guests to the reception. At most Scottish weddings the piping tradition continues with the newly married couple being piped to their table along with the bridal party. Finally, steeped in ritual is the custom of the piper handing a dagger called a 'dirk' to the couple as they cut the cake (the groom places his right hand over the bride's and together you slice through the cake) to the accompaniment of the bagpipes.
With roots that stretch back centuries, no Scottish wedding would be complete without dancing. Popular at weddings are céilidhs (a traditional Gaelic social dance). The music is cheerful and lively and the basic steps can be learned easily. At such a dance a 'caller' - who is a sort of cross between a dance instructor and a master of ceremonies - will 'call' the dances with a brief explanation or 'run-through' of the next dance before the music starts. The general format of a céilidh is the 'set', which consists of four couples, with each pair of couples facing another in a square or rectangular formation. Each couple exchanges position with the facing couple, and also facing couples exchange partners, while all the time keeping in step with the beat of the music. It is not as complicated as it sounds and during the dance the caller 'calls' the moves as reminders for the dancers of what to do next. It is great fun and for guests of all ages. If you hire a céilidh band (see 'Music & Entertainment' in our Wedding Suppliers search) the caller will adapt the dancing to suit the experience (or lack of it!) of your guests and will keep moves simple.
There are other less obvious ways to give your wedding a touch of Scottish tradition. If you incorporate them, perhaps indicate their meaning and origins either in your order of service, or ask whoever performs them to explain their relevance. 'Handfasting' is a Celtic wedding tradition dating from the Middle Ages when there was not always a minister available to perform a marriage ceremony. Rather than wait for one, couples would perform a handfasting where their hands were bound together in a cord or a tartan cloth. It legally bound them for up to a year and a day allowing time until a clergyman passed through and could perform the ceremony. In a modern wedding, the handfasting can be performed during the exchanging of wedding vows (and in both civil and religious ceremonies).
Other traditions you can incorporate include the bride being handed a horseshoe for luck by the children (held upside down of course to hold the luck), the bride wearing an old-fashioned sixpence in her shoe (you can buy them cheaply at on-line auction houses) and a 'Wedding Scramble'. The latter is a tradition dictating the bride's father throw a handful of coins for children to collect as his daughter steps into her carriage (or more usually these days a car) when departing for the marriage ceremony. The custom is believed to bring financial luck. For more traditions and customs see our Scottish Wedding Traditions page.
Preparing a Wedding Day Schedule is advisable so you and everyone in the bridal party knows where they should be and when. Just compiling one will focus the mind and ensure nothing is left to chance. When working out the timings on your schedule, work backwards from the ceremony and allow sufficient time to travel to appointments and get ready. A typical schedule would include all or most of the following (just add your timings):
SUPPLIERS PREPARATION
Cake Delivery to venue
Flowers to Ceremony
Flowers to Reception
Band DJ set-up
Bride
Hair/Make-up
Appointments
Bouquets & Buttonhole
Delivery
Photographer Arrives
Bridesmaids/Bride's Mother depart for Ceremony
Bride Departs for Ceremony
Groom
Meet Best Man
Buttonhole/Corsage Delivery
Depart for Ceremony
Groom & Attendants' Photographs
Greet Guests
Ceremony
Arrival of the Bride
Photographs
Depart for Reception
Reception
Drinks Reception
Wedding Breakfast
Speeches
(Father of the Bride, Groom, Best Man)
Cake Cutting
First Dance
Dancing
Bride & Groom Depart
Carriages
Finally there's your wedding night: do spend some time planning where you'll stay and ensure you wake up somewhere wonderful the morning after your celebration. Make use of the Essence Guides which you can download from our Wedding Guests page to explore the region you have chosen for your wedding and what it has to offer. If you and your guests have traveled long distances for your wedding and want to make more than a day of it, then in Scotland you've the perfect excuse: an old Shetland tradition allows a 'Second Night' where more eating, drinking and dancing occurs the day after the wedding!
Next time we'll be looking at the Honeymoon and suggesting that you spend
your first days together as man and wife in Scotland: until then - happy
wedding planning!
VisitScotland's Wedding Planner
Wedding Top Tips
Month One: Getting Started
Month Two: Finding Your Dream Venue
Month Three: Bridal Wear
Month Four: Deciding Groomswear
Month Five: Wedding Day Food
Month Six: Wedding Day Flowers
Month Seven: Photography
Month Eight: Transport
Month Nine: Guests
Month Ten: Hair and Beauty
Month Twelve: Honeymoon
